Choosing Happiness

All my regular readers know that I am a big believer in training your brain to go in the direction you want it to go.

Many of us spend time with extended family at this time of year.  And for many, that involves more irritation and aggravation than it needs to.

It is hard to imagine a family that is entirely cohesive.  There are so many different topics that people can disagree on.  There are so many habits and idiosyncrasies that can get on one person or another's last nerve.

But these inevitable irritants don't have to manifest in negative emotions.  You have the power to decide that none of the things that have upset you in the past will upset you in the future.

Sure, Aunt Lucretia is going to ask why you still work for a company that does the devil's work, and Uncle Caesar is going to go on a minority bashing tirade.  You can't control that.  And past efforts to redirect have been unsuccessful.

You can turn it all into a game.

Sit with your significant other and your inside circle, and create family holiday bingo.

List all the inevitable things that will happen that have upset you in the past.   Divide up the list evenly among the participants.  The first one whose list is complete gets the bingo.  Decide ahead of time what the prize will be.

Now, when the inevitable happens, you and your insiders can look at each other and smile, knowing that you predicted your family's own particular crazy with astounding accuracy.  Because you have made it a game, the negative emotions don't have to be engaged.

My wish for everyone is that they have an extended family free of angst, but I know for so many of you that is just a dream.

So, give up the angst.  Choose happiness.  Choose to not engage negatively.  Choose to find the humor in how well you know these people.  You probably have already chosen to love them even though they are very different from you.   Choosing to love them is not choosing to agree with them, nor is it choosing to try to change them.

Be a shining example of the person you wish everyone could be.  Kind, thoughtful, loving, happy.  That is the best way to inspire change anyway.  And enjoy the bingo game.  Surprisingly enough, when those we love are gone it is often their peculiarities that we miss the most.

So, choose to celebrate what makes you and your family unique.  And I hope you get the bingo.