Dag nab it!

Well, I wanted to have finished my novella by the end of March.  Dag nab it!  I missed my deadline.  I kind of knew that was going to happen when I went through a long dry spell this winter.  I knew where I wanted my story to go, but I couldn't figure out how to get it there.

And isn't that just life in a nutshell?  How often do you find yourself knowing what you want out of life and not knowing how to get it?

Jobs, relationships, finances, housing, there are so many places where it is easy to imagine the life you want, but seemingly impossible to see how to get to that life.

I've been very, very lucky.  My life isn't perfect, but it is pretty darn good.  I love my home, and my adopted home city of New Orleans.  I love my husband, my children, and my dogs.  I have great friends.

I have days when I can't help but focus on what I don't like.  I wish I had more friends close by.  I wish I could see my daughter more often.  I wish my mother wasn't lost to dementia.

But when it comes to imagining a better life than the one I have, all the imaginings are small.  And I have a plan, albeit not usually an executable plan, but a plan to make my life exactly how I want it to be.

My plans involve my books generating tremendous wealth when they are published.  This is a great imagining that will likely not be realized.  But that is perfectly OK.

My books have evolved since I started writing them.  I am making imaginary lives that I covet happen in my stories.  Some of you will recognize the imaginary lives as you read them, but many of you will not know where I am autobiographical in my books, and where I am simply creating worlds and lives that make me happy.

My blog post yesterday was about falling down the rabbit hole, and when my stories won't flow, I spend a lot of time clicking mindlessly around the internet.  I'm working on breaking that habit.

I cleaned out my email inbox today, that was a start to uncluttering my mind.

I can see the path to the end of my novella.  The second book in the series, which I will publish the last chapter of with my novella, I still am figuring out.  The characters are telling me where they will and will not go.

That was one of the big things that happened in my novella.  I imagined a character as not the nicest person.  But he wouldn't let me make him not nice, and now he is one of my absolute favorites.  I know I am making up stories, but my characters feel real to me.  They won't allow me to write them in a way not consistent with who they are.

I have a feeling that a lot of people will think my stories are too simplistic, or too good to be true.

I want the world that I am writing.  A world where people care about each other and demonstrate it.  A world where there is conflict, but conflict is settled in the kindest way possible.

So, I missed my deadline.  I hope to finish before May.  I'm excited to finish the novella so that I can have some people proofread it, while I finish the second book in the series so I can publish them together while working on the next installment.

And I want to get back to my historical novel.  Lots to do to keep me busy for as long as I can imagine.  Here's to busy days and forgiving yourself when you miss a deadline.

And to all the happy worlds you can imagine.