It is Monday, and it is football season in America. This means that for the fans of a particular National Football League team, it is either a good day or a bad day.
What?
Football game outcomes ruin people's day?
Unfortunately, yes they do.
I'm a fan of the New Orleans Saints. I really love my team. I am excited when they play well, and even more excited when they play well and win. I go into a bit of a post game funk when they don't do well, but I try to shake it off after a few hours.
After all, I have no control over how well or how badly the team plays on any given Sunday.
Listening to the radio this morning and afternoon, I'm amazed at how many people are having a spectacularly bad day because the Saints played poorly yesterday.
There is absolutely nothing logical about allowing the outcome of a game that you didn't play in to ruin your day, or heaven forbid, your week.
But apparently, people all over are allowing just that.
I understand why the players or coaches would be having a bad day. No one likes to perform less than their best, especially when thousands of fans are watching. But unless a player or coach suffered a serious injury, it is time to reflect on what didn't go well, formulate an improvement plan, and start working the improvement plan.
It's a game.
The game offers a good escape from reality while it is being played. A team can be a rallying entity for a population, as the Saints were for New Orleans after Katrina.
But it's just a game. Played by people. Extraordinary athletes, every one of them. But flawed, fallible humans, just like the rest of us.
Why is it so easy for humans to allow things over which they have no control to impact their emotions so readily? Is there an emotional void that the allegiance to a sports team is filling, so that it has more import than is healthy? Or is it just easier to spend emotion on something you have no control over so that their is no emotion left for the things that you should be spending your emotion on?
If a person chooses to use all their available emotion on devotion to a sports team, then their emotional pie is used up.
At certain times, when life is really hard, using up your emotion for devotion to a sports team might be a very valuable escape. But as a lifestyle, not so much.
I think this choice, or non-choice, allows us to not deal with the very real emotional issues of our own lives. If I spend my emotion on the Saints, then I don't have the emotional energy to explore why I stay in a job I hate. Or why I stay in a relationship that is not healthy for me. Or why I let my children grow further and further away from me.
I'm all for getting caught up in the moment and excitement of a sporting event. I'm all for healthy escapism.
But when someone else's activities, their accomplishments and failures is more emotionally impactful on your life than your own accomplishments and failures, it might be time to take a step back.
We each get one life, with an uncertain number of days. Choose to spend your time and emotions on things that enrich that one precious life.
I'll always love my Saints. I'll always be happy when they play well. If they get really bad again, I'll record the games and spend my time in ways that fills up my happiness bucket. Then when I watch the recording I can fast forward if it isn't worth my time.
Try as hard as you can to grab the good moments, and let the bad ones pass you by. At the end, life is just the moments we make. Controlling the negative impact we allow external forces to have on those moments is a cornerstone to a happy life.
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