The cacophony of meanness

My mom always told me if I had nothing good to say, to say nothing.  Apparently, a lot of moms didn't teach their children that.

I use the internet and social media almost every day.  I appreciate the ability to stay in touch with family and friends that live far away.  I appreciate the ability to research just about any topic I want to.  I appreciate that not all internet sources are reliable and that I have to exercise due diligence before I believe what I see and read.

What I don't appreciate is how mean so many people seem to feel comfortable being when they post on the internet and social media.

I read posts from people I always thought were nice people that are astounding in the level of meanness they contain.

I'm not talking about snarky, satirical or offensively funny content either.  Political satire and cartoons are usually a little mean, and can be disregarded because the genre is well known for being edgy.  Those platforms were recognized long before an internet and social media existed.

I'm talking about the meanness of posting embarrassing pictures of someone, with the intent of embarrassing them.  I'm talking about ridiculing people's beliefs because they don't align with yours.  I'm talking about calling entire groups of people stupid, or lazy, or immoral, or evil because they don't share one or more of your belief systems.

Every human is guilty of meanness at some point in time.  It can be unconscious meanness, or thoughtless meanness, it is not always intentional.  The thing is, when someone is mean without bad intent, and it is a momentary act that they can be immediately called on to correct, the overall boundary of acceptable meanness in society isn't changed.

With the proliferation of meanness on social media and the internet, the boundary of acceptable meanness seems to keep being pushed further and further out.

Will Rogers, the great American humorist, said that we are all ignorant, just on different subjects.  It is OK to be ignorant, as that is fixable by acquiring information to close the gap.  What is not OK is to be intolerant and mean to others because of their ignorance.

What ever happened to seeking to understand?  It seems social media has become a platform to present a view on a subject, and then criticize and/or demean everyone who doesn't agree with you.

We will never all agree or get along, but we don't have to sacrifice civility because of that.  It is OK to agree to disagree.  When a feedback loop is available (like a conversation with words and people in the same room) contentious subjects can be safely discussed.  Social media is not a good platform for debate.  Too much nuance is lost, and too much hostility generated.

With a Presidential Election coming up in the United States in 2016, I'm afraid the cacophony of meanness will gain additional volume.

I'm not advocating silence.  If you feel strongly in support of a person or issue, by all means say so.  It is not necessary to say mean things about those you do not support.  If you want to relay factual information about someone or something, relay just the facts.  Trust that others are capable of processing those facts and making their own decisions.  Stating your beliefs and convictions is fine.  Calling people who don't agree with you ugly or hateful names is not fine.

Try to do your part and not add to the noise.  If you mother didn't tell you, I will.  If you don't have anything good to say, say nothing.