Did I just run out of things to say?

I am kind of embarrassed by how much my blog postings have decreased.  In 2015, the year I started this blog, I posted 126 entries.  In 2016, I posted 125.  In 2017, 54, and 7 so far in 2018.

I also feel guilty about my lack of posts.  The world needs more positivity and light.  I haven't been really good at finding that light.  The reason I feel guilty is that I haven't forced myself to look for the light either.

It is America's Got Talent season again.  I love that show.  And I love the stories of courage and hope it brings along with trained trick-performing cats, and magicians, and acrobats, and dancers, and singers.  The variety of talent is awesome, and the stories can be heartwarming and uplifting.

I noticed something very hopeful as I watched last night's episode.  There were two comedians whose comedy was of the mean variety.  They were not laughed at, and didn't make it through.

That made me very happy.  Not that those people were disappointed, but that the people in the audience were not entertained by meanness, and the panel of judges weren't either.

Maybe, just maybe we are reaching a tipping point.  Maybe, just maybe, people like me who have been silent are finally ready to start talking again about kindness, and inclusion and love.

We all fall into patterns, and let's face it, humans tend to go with the flow, with the path of least resistance.  When the dialogue turns mean, it doesn't go there all at once. There is a raised eyebrow, a snarky comment, a disparaging remark. And that becomes the new normal.  So the ratio of nice to not nice keeps inching to a terrible place.  We have reached a terrible place.

I don't know how people who I always thought were nice people can support people who are mean.  I heard a commentator on the radio yesterday opine that as long as people are doing well financially, they don't care about the character or actions of the entities that they think have created their favorable economic condition.  He is probably right - and that is just so sad.

I honestly can say I would rather be poor and hungry than be mean, or to support meanness.  I have been poor and hungry, and it didn't make me mean, in fact, I shared the scraps I had with anyone who needed them. 

I like the fact that I am financially comfortable, but it doesn't mean as much to me as trying to be a good person does.

And I truly believe if we all try to be good, and throw our support behind people who try to be good, that it makes the world a better place.

I need to find a way to address the meanness I see online without being mean myself.  I need to find a way to ask a question, or make a comment that redirects, knowing full well I may be redirecting the anger and meanness in my direction.

So no, I didn't run out of things to say.  I just felt crushed by the reality of day to day life in the United States of America.  I was tongue tied by the base level of much of the discourse I see and hear.  I was muted by the voices in my head that said why bother.

I have to bother.  We need all the voices for kindness, love and inclusion we can find.  So what if I sound like I'm repeating myself.

That has never stopped the mean people from repeating themselves.  I'm not going to let it stop me anymore either.