I'm kind of proud of myself that I have kept up with this blog. I didn't know what I was doing when I started, not that I know what I'm doing now, but I have kept at it.
When I started, I think I thought I would wake up every day with something profound to say and to write about. That hasn't worked out so well.
I have lost and found my voice many times over the last twenty-one months. I haven't been as funny as I wanted to be. I've been angry more times than I wanted to be.
As I look inward to find the words to write, I find that I have grown more introverted. I'm still pretty adept at social situations and small talk, but I find it takes more energy than it used to.
When I started this blog, I thought it would be a continuation of my work life, a blog centered around how to be a successful leader in the workplace. After not too much time, I decided just to share my thoughts and memories, and try to encourage people to make a better world for themselves.
The world can be a very scary place sometimes. And it can be a very difficult place. I remembered today advice I used to give people for coping at work that is just as useful for coping at life. Here is a little checklist.
- Create a happy place - create a collage of pictures, or of inspirational quotes, or art. When everything feels like too much, focus on your happy place. Resurrect the memories of the good time the pictures or quotes or art evoke. Bask in those memories.
- Create a playlist for a bad day - decide what music supports what mood. Have a playlist for when you want to spend time experiencing sorrow fully. Have another playlist that lifts you out of sorrow. Have another that just makes you happy no matter what.
- Create a folder (digital or paper) of nice things people have sent you - I have a paper folder full of cards and letters, and a digital folder full of emails that I can read through when I start feeling bad about myself. We all need to be lifted up sometimes. Save the uplifting messages you receive to soothe your soul when it is wounded.
- Create a self-care ritual - whether it is taking a warm bath, or reading a good book, or practicing a craft that makes you happy, or drinking a special drink or eating a special meal; have a self-care ritual that you can perform when you need nurturing. One of the most important and critical life skills is the ability to self-nurture. Practice this skill so that you can use it when you need it.
- Create a list of the people you are thankful to have in your life. When the world seems particularly bleak, do something for one of the people on the list, and concentrate on the gift they have been in your life while you do it. You will be amazed at how good it will make you feel.
- Challenge yourself, and be gentle when you fail. A life without challenge is bland. But trying things that are hard means you will fail sometimes. Give yourself permission to fail and to try again. Congratulate yourself on having the courage to try.
- Laugh. Every day if you can. There is always something ridiculous in the universe. Laughter releases hormones that are good for you in countless ways. Save jokes and funny cartoons, and go read through them when you think nothing is funny. One of them will save you.
- Love abundantly. Love is a great healer and enabler. Love the people in your life with all you have in you. Love isn't something that someone deserves. Love is just a pure gift.
- Forgive. Forgiveness is a balm for the wound of the wounded, not a balm for the person who has hurt you. When you forgive someone, you take away their power. There is no need to forget, or to entertain everyone in your life. But forgiveness is lifesaving.
- Rest. Everyone gets tired. Everyone needs to stop and recharge their batteries occasionally. Give yourself permission to rest when you need to.
There it is. A ten step plan to make 2017 a better year for you than 2016 was. Happy New Year! I look forward to sharing 2017 with you.
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