Beginnings, Endings and Time

As another year draws to a close, I find myself thinking about the role that time and the calendar play in our lives.

As I was driving this morning, the radio talk show host was talking about New Year's and New Year's resolutions.  In the next segment, he was asking his guest to "grade" what kind of year the City of New Orleans had.  And in the upcoming segment, he was asking for listeners to call in and "grade" 2016.

I, like many others, find myself at the end of a year giving the year a grade.  Particular years stand out as very good, others, not so much.

What struck me this morning is every day is the start of a new year.  We can choose any moment in time to re-chart our course, to redirect our destiny.

Sometimes we know when a beginning is coming, like I knew that February 14, 1988 would be the first day of my life as Anne Marie St. Clair, the first day I was married to my husband.

I knew I was going to be a mommy for nine months.  But it wasn't until my daughter arrived on October 11, 1976 that I knew I would be a mommy to a daughter, and that my life would be forever better for it.

My last day as a cigarette smoker was October 27, 1987.  I just lit the last cigarette in that pack and decided it would be my last.

I didn't know until it happened that January 14, 2000 would be the last day I would share a planet with my dad.  But life changed forever that day.

My point is that there are beginnings and endings all the time that don't give a care about the calendar.

If you want to slam the door on 2016 and never look back, go for it.  However, if you are feeling like all you can do to keep on keeping on is to put one foot in front of the other and keep going, you have my permission to disregard that a calendar year is ending.

We use the calendar to standardize on the passage of time.  We mark our days by weeks, and months, and years.

And because we do that, so many people promise to start to change their life on the day that starts a week, a month or a year.

But mostly, we have no idea which day will change our life.  It can be a Tuesday, or the 14th, or mid-year.  You can choose to stay the course that you are on, or change course any day you choose.

Society can create a sense of pressure as years begin and end to "do better" in the new year.

My advice?   Just try to do good.  If you feel compelled to make changes in your life, make them when you feel strong enough to see them through.  If you feel like you are on the path you are meant to be on, stay the course.

January 1 of any year is just another day.  It may or may not be a memorable day in your life.  It is perfectly okay if you choose to make it unremarkable.

You don't have a duty to change your life because a calendar year is ending.  You don't have an obligation to stay stuck in a bad place because there is no milestone on the calendar.

One of the amazing truths of my life is that while I can look at a picture from a happy event of my past and tell you what the event is, I can't always tell you what the calendar year was when the event took place.  Because it isn't really that important.

And that's the point.